When someone in the family has a hearing loss, the whole family has a hearing problem.
Addressing hearing loss with a loved one may not be easy, but it is essential for their well-being and the quality of your relationship. Hearing loss tends to manifest gradually and often goes unnoticed until a caring person brings it to our attention. As hearing diminishes, individuals may develop subtle coping mechanisms that become second nature, such as nodding in agreement or laughing when others do, all in an effort to keep up with conversations.
Remarkably, research indicates that it often takes individuals over seven years, from the moment they realize they have hearing difficulties to seeking professional hearing loss treatment. That’s why having a conversation about hearing loss as early as possible is of paramount importance. By the time most people acknowledge a change in someone’s hearing, a substantial amount of time has already passed since the onset of their hearing challenges.
Why does hearing loss often go unnoticed for many people?
This is primarily because hearing loss tends to be a gradual process. For most individuals, the decline in hearing begins with the high-pitched sounds, where we produce sounds like “s,” “th,” and “f.” These high-frequency sounds deteriorate slowly over time, while the lower-pitched sounds, where we produce many vowel sounds, often remain relatively clear.
As a result, people with a surprising degree of hearing loss can still perceive that someone is talking to them, but they may struggle to decipher the exact words being said. This paradox can be deceiving, as when we continue to hear softer, low-pitched sounds in our environment, we may wrongly assume that our hearing is perfectly fine, thereby denying the existence of any problem.
Common Signs of Hearing Loss
- Mumbled Speech and Frequent Requests to Repeat: Individuals with hearing loss often struggle to decipher speech. They might know something has been said but miss certain speech sounds, leading to consonant confusion, like “sit” instead of “fit.” Responding incorrectly or belatedly is common as they piece information together using context and past experiences, placing extra cognitive strain.
- Difficulty in Noisy Gatherings: Hearing loss often manifests as increased difficulty in group or noisy settings. Some may dominate conversations to control the dialogue, while others may withdraw to avoid misunderstandings.
- TV Volume Control: Needing to crank up the TV volume can be a sign of hearing loss. It’s not constant but often associated with catching high pitches in soft scenes, leading to inconsistent volume adjustments and attributing them to the program instead of hearing issues.
- Smiling and Nodding During Conversations: Coping mechanisms include excessive nodding and smiling to appear engaged, as well as relying on lip reading, which can be problematic during phone calls or distant conversations.
- Withdrawal from Conversations: Hearing loss may cause individuals to withdraw from conversations, impacting connections with loved ones. It’s associated with isolation, anger, depression, lost intimacy, and cognitive decline risk.
- Tinnitus (Ringing/Buzzing in Quiet Rooms): Persistent ringing or buzzing in quiet environments, known as tinnitus, is a common symptom of developing hearing loss. It occurs as the brain compensates for hearing loss in specific regions.
Noticing these signs is a signal that it’s time to have a conversation with a loved one about their hearing. Recognizing these indicators can pave the way for valuable discussions and encourage seeking professional help for hearing assessments and support.
How to Approach the Conversation About
Hearing Loss With Your Loved One
When you observe signs of hearing loss in a cherished family member or friend, it’s natural to want to address it. However, initiating this important conversation requires care and consideration. Here’s a step-by-step guide to help you navigate this sensitive topic effectively.
1. Position Yourself as an Ally
2. Choose the Right Time and Place
Selecting the appropriate time and setting for this delicate conversation is vital. While it may be tempting to address it in the heat of the moment, consider that both you and your loved one might be emotionally reactive during such times. Moments of frustration, like having to repeat yourself or clarify misheard statements, can lead to less receptive conversations.
Find a private, comfortable, and quiet space where your loved one won’t feel embarrassed, stigmatized, or overwhelmed. Opting for the right time and place underscores the importance of the discussion.
3. Understand Their Perspective
Acknowledge that your loved one’s experience of hearing loss is their reality. They may genuinely believe that they would hear well if others didn’t mumble, because to them, that’s what it sounds like. They may provide examples to defend their experience, such as needing slower speech or facing them for better understanding. It’s important to recognize their perspective to avoid a confrontational exchange.
4. Be Honest and Highlight the Impact
To encourage your loved one to seek treatment for hearing loss, be honest about its impact on their life and relationships. Point out what they might be missing, whether it’s the punchline of a joke, fewer phone calls from grandchildren due to communication difficulties, or a decline in social activities due to noisy environments. Emphasize how it affects both their enjoyment and the quality of life for those around them.
5. Express Your Support
Let your loved one know that you are there for them every step of the way. Taking the initiative to address hearing loss and seek treatment can be daunting, and knowing they have a support network makes a significant difference. Whether it’s accompanying them to appointments, providing emotional support, or helping them adapt to new hearing aids, your presence can be invaluable.
In the words of a renowned professor in the field, “When someone in the family has a hearing loss, the whole family has a hearing problem.” Highlighting that hearing loss affects not just them but also the people who care about them can motivate action.
6. Taking Next Steps
Closing the conversation with the assurance of your support, from that initial discussion to their first hearing test and beyond, can make a profound difference in their hearing health journey. Together, you can rediscover the world of sound, enhance the quality of life, reconnect with loved ones, and savor those priceless moments that truly matter. It’s a journey well worth taking, with a reward more precious than gold: a life enriched by the beauty of sound.
